The Greg Coleman Report

Greg Coleman has offered his unique view on the Vikings and his vast experience of player interaction and sports reporting to our humble blog. This session, Greg touches on the offseason moves of the Vikings as well as things to look forward to …

Greg Coleman shown interviewing a great community guy, Gus Frerotte.

Greg Coleman shown interviewing a great community guy, Gus Frerotte.

(In soft tones, sounding slightly down trodden)

Fans, it’s been a tough offseason for our favorite Vikings. Like most fans, we were expecting a big push once the free agency clock ticked green and the engines revved. Yet in Vikings land the ship never truly set sail on land as the only significant move was for Sage Rosenfels. Although he’s a great guy with Midwest roots and is a wonderful family man, I think I speak for several fans thoughts when I say that there’s just no assurance that he’ll be able to get the job done in Minnesota. There is just no viable option at quarterback, and that’s a tough bird to swallow.

(Heavy sigh, grinds toe into dirt)

After that dustbuster start to free agency, I know fans were anxious to see what moves would happen next on the free agency bus, but there were few stops on those rails. The team did manage to get T.J. Housmandazadah, err … Houshmandzadeh into the facilities to kick the proverbial car bumpers. While many fans were excited to reel in the interest of an All Star player on the field, and a quality contributor in the community off of it, the contract numbers were a bit too high and the Vikings brass failed to bait this lizard. Once again, the Vikings found themselves empty handed without even a bird in the bush.

(Long pause, hear Coleman putting away Kleenex)

At this point, Vikings fans thought that they hit the utmost rocky top and that things couldn’t get anymore dismal. But that was before the team let walk two of their most important free agents ever, in the always classy Darren Sharper and the hometown gyro Matt Birk, both two great community members and valuable veterans on the field. In just a disgusting move, the high ups never made a strong push for Darren, and sat on their pens too long to try and have Matty B sign with where his heart was.

(Sniffs)

I know we’ll all miss the big lug, but after talking quietly with him for several hours in hushed tones and many tears from myself, I feel confident in saying that I expect him to one day come back and be involved with this community that he loves so much, in one form or an other form. I also have no doubt that he will retire and then be a first ballot Canton candidate and go into that glory hole proudly as a Minnesota Vikings. If only we could all be as noble.

(Shakes head, puts face in hands for a moment)

At this point, fellow fans, there is not much to look forward too. It appears as if Nafu Tahini will probably sign with the Bengals, which is such a shame, as he was a great player off the field as well and was always great for a half yard swing pass. Most higher ups will try to sell you on the idea of subdiction by attraction for a team, when they lose players without adding high class, noble veterans in their place, but I just can’t see that lime of thought work here. I want to convince fans, and myself, that the team is better than they were at the end of that heart break of a playoff game, but I’m just not so sure.

(Dampens eyes with handkerchief)

Hopefully the draft will provide that jump set that the team needs to get interest rolling again. Otherwise I see fan support to reach an all time low. Also, I’ve done some scouting on my own and have found some really great character guys that I could suggest to Vikings management, some guys that would always be welcomed in this community. But the hope for a great draft just isn’t there, and we need to prepare ourselves for dark days in this boat.

(Hangs head, drifts to sleep)

PJD

About PJD

I once saw Paul Edinger kick a 56-yard field goal for the Minnesota Vikings against the Green Bay Packers to win a game in the Metrodome. It was exhilarating.

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