Brandon Burton is Afraid of Shanks

This likely went unnoticed by a lot of people during training camp, but Minnesota Vikings’ favorite foam partier, Mistral Raymond, alerted us to an alarming fact which was uncovered during training camp. New rookie cornerback, Brandon Burton (I know, it’s actually a real person though, not a nickname for a shit head!), apparently is deathly afraid of Shanks, and there is video evidence to prove it.
You see, what Burton is watching here is hidden footage of Shanko stepping out of the shower and toweling off. I’ve seen the video and, let me tell you, it is quite alarming. At first you’re like, “Damn, he sure is spending some time drying off his abdomen region. What’s the deal with that? Op, now he’s drying his leg from thigh to toe, first one there, then the second and then the thir …. wait … is … is that … OH GOD!” Frightening stuff.

But we at least all now know that Burton has a snake phobia. Of course, his new nickname is now Indy.

“Why does it have to be Shanks! I hate Shanks!” 


About PJD

I once saw Paul Edinger kick a 56-yard field goal for the Minnesota Vikings against the Green Bay Packers to win a game in the Metrodome. It was exhilarating.