Ponderis-Jackson

Is Christian Ponder Actually Tarvaris Jackson?

TarVar Jackson

We've been fooled, every last one of us.

Ever since the Vikings drafted "Christian Ponder" and let former Minnesota Vikings starting quarterback, Tarvaris Jackson, walk in free agency to sign with Seattle, we haven't seen any type of improvement in quarterback play. You would think we would, or at the very least that we would notice some type of differences in style, or numbers, or approach to the game, ANYthing. As Vikings fans, we were clamoring to have Tarvaris (or TarVar, as he was always affectionately called around here) run out of town and to bring in the new franchise quarterback. It seemed we had our wish when the Vikings picked Ponder. But we should have seen it coming, we should have seen the signs.

We never got a new quarterback after Brad Childress left. We just got Tarvaris Jackson in White Face.

Vikings blog Daily Norseman brings some compelling evidence to our attention. Take a look at these numbers comparing "Christian Ponder" and TarVar in their starts as quarterback of the Vikings. The results … May be shocking:

"Christian Ponder" Stats Tarvaris Jackson
22 Starts in Minnesota 20
3,984 Passing Yards 4,086
24 Passing Touchdowns 26
22 Interceptions 22
58.7 Completion Percentage 59.4
76.6 Passer Rating 76.7

But this isn't all. We should have seen the other signs too, the more obvious ones. We were expecting a prototypical passer with Christian Ponder, a quarterback who would stand in the pocket and throw the ball down field. But no. We ended up with, oddly enough, a white running quarterback, a "scrambler" if you prefer to use the Caucasian term for running quarterback, very similar to TarVar's style. And the number of times both of these "different quarterbacks" have run into or banged knees with Adrian Peterson? Too numerous to count. There is simply no way there could be TWO separately people on this earth dumb enough to do that. And the number seven jersey. It was so obvious. "Ponder" couldn't even pretend he was trying to be double the quarterback he was as TarVar by picking 14 or something. Instead, he remained the status quo and drove this team to the ground while wearing the same, cursed, number.

He's like Batman. TarVar is like Batman for the Vikings, but an evil one. Not one that protects fans from failures and harm, but one who inflicts it. It's the only answer. Have you ever seen "Ponder" and TarVar in the same place together? Of course not, because it hasn't happened. It will never happen. He has to spend too much time in the chair to apply his White Face to pass as "Christian Ponder," young, franchise quarterback of the Vikings. But it won't work, Pondaris Jackson, we're on to you. We've seen how you both like to take your shirts off. That was the first giveaway. The interceptions and poor play was just the final straw.

Shirtless Ponderis Jackson

But we've learned our lesson. We kicked you to the curb and your alter ego is next, buddy, no doubt. So don't expect to see a number seven jersey on the field next year. We won't allow it. And wipe that White Face off, you look ridiculous.

PJD

About PJD

I once saw Paul Edinger kick a 56-yard field goal for the Minnesota Vikings against the Green Bay Packers to win a game in the Metrodome. It was exhilarating.

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