Is It a Better Story When the Vikings Lose?
Hey, guess what: The Vikings are terrible. We’re a pretty poor professional team, at least when it comes to important things like winning, having attractive cheerleaders, and not employing guys who beat up their girlfriends. But we’re getting a cool new stadium! Guess you can’t win them all.

The losing thing shouldn’t be anything new for you, if you really follow the team. You’ve been through lots of ups and downs and likely bouts of depression. But, crazy as it sounds, it may have all been worth it. Really! Comedian Louis C.K. makes an interesting point about rooting for your team to lose, because it’s a better storyline. In an interview he recently did with that jack off Bill Simmons:

Simmons: You watched Pacquiao vs. Bradley and were, I’m sure, horrified like the rest of us.

Louis: Yeah, but I love the stories, you know?

Simmons: You were in on Bradley, then?

Louis: No, I don’t think he won the fight, but I’m glad it happened the way it did, because it’s a great story. It’s like… I’m a Patriots fan, but the year they went undefeated, I really wanted the Giants to beat them in the Super Bowl.

Simmons: What?

Louis: It’s just a better story.

Simmons: C’mon.

Louis: It’s more traumatic, it’s more fun. And I also like watching my team handle losing. It’s a great thing to watch.

Now, I know. “Oh, boo hoo. Your favorite team went undefeated, lost the Super Bowl, but still won three others during a decade span. HOW TERRIBLE FOR YOU.” But ultimately, he kind of has a point. Let’s explore!
Let’s get one thing straight first. Louis C.K. likely has an unofficial doctorate degree in Human Anguish, so if he’s telling me that watching your team lose is more rewarding somehow, I’m inclined to believer him. You’d believe a urologist if they told you that you had penis cancer, right? So why discount this?

The other piece here is his key use of the word “traumatic.” Watching your team lose should just be upsetting and sucky. It really should be traumatic. It should leave a lasting scar on your psyche and mess your up for a long time. Like when you walked in on your parents bumping uglies. That shit will leave you messed up for a lifetime. Likewise, so should your favorite team losing.

Now, yes, Vikings fans already have a ton of trauma built up around this team. We’ve experienced trauma unlike any shit hole Patriots fans. We get what crying yourself to sleep is really like, but even beyond that, NOT crying yourself to sleep over a loss because you’re just so damn numb to it all. And this track record will turn around at some point. I do believe that. Some day we’ll come out on top, we’ll win a Super Bowl, and it’ll ultimately be sweeter for us than almost any other team around because of all of this trauma we’ve suffered through. Except for maybe Brown’s fans. Of Bills fans. Shit, those fans have been destroyed. But so have we.

The point is, I guess, that Louis C.K. is just kind of right with this view. Losing is more fun. It gives us more to talk about, more to bitch about, more to look back on when it really hurts. But beyond that, the BEST type of losing is when we get so close – like in the 2009 NFL Championship game – and then have our hearts torn out. THAT type of shit will leave a lasting impression on you. And you know what? It was an awesome time. I have great memories of that game, of the reaction afterwards, of how close it brought all of the Vikings fans together in our hatred for the Saints, Favre, Childress, and everything else. It was a fantastic experience, even though we lost. Would we have had that same experience winning? Probably. But then you’d have to win all over again next year. With losing, it’s terrible every time!

So keep on losing Vikings! I mean, get better, so that the losing ends up meaning more, but keep losing. Eventually, the odds will be so far in our favor that we’ll have to win, and that’ll be super cool too, but until that happens in about 50 years, I’ll learn to just savor these loses all the more.


About PJD

I once saw Paul Edinger kick a 56-yard field goal for the Minnesota Vikings against the Green Bay Packers to win a game in the Metrodome. It was exhilarating.