The Super Bowl. The most EPIC day of the year.
That’s from that stupid Visa commercial. Every time I heard that this year I wanted to kill everyone in sight and even some people I couldn’t see who were behind me. Jesus Christ, marketing sucks donkey these days. Point being, the Super Bowl is a weird thing, and who better to tackle the elusiveness of the event than our favorite Minnesota Vikings punter Chris Kluwe. Before the Super Bowl, he wrote a guest column at the Pioneer Press talking about what the Super Bowl IS … and what it ISN’T.
SHIT JUST GOT REAL.
|“The Super Bowl. It is the culmination of an entire year’s worth of work for 106 players and their coaches. It is the gladiatorial spectacle writ large, an entire nation the stage, hundreds of millions of spectators enthralled by 60 minutes of savagery, a chance for three hours to be part of something greater than an individual life … It is everything.
“The Super Bowl. It is nothing. It is the overindulged watching the overcompensated while marketing companies rub their well-manicured hands with glee. It is the definition of materialistic consumption as million-dollar advertisements vie with one another to see which can blare the loudest, bedazzled peacocks and sequined foxes strutting their wares for an insatiable audience drunk off emotion and liquor and too many mini hotdogs such a steal at only $3 a box and, no, don’t ask what’s in them.”
NERD! What is this, Socrates (pronounced “Sock-rah-tees” of course) take on the event? The dude is dead! Let dead dogs lie! Unless you can dig them up for a quick 15 minutes of fame!
Anyway, Kluwe is known for being a bit more intellectual from the rest of us, no questions there. His article is a bit hyperbolic and something I would expect from Peter King (no harm intended here!), but – on a macro level – it is still kind of interesting to see an employee within such a conglomerate institution take such a well rounded stance on it. Truth be told, as an average fan (and I do mean average in the bad way when talking about me, of course!), it’s extremely complicated and probably impossible to really understand what the ACTUAL Super Bowl means to all those guys on the team. Oh, sure, we all played some high school basketball (no I didn’t) or won the Super Bowl in Madden NFL (cheated), but truthfully, we don’t get it.
This is why having Kluwe straddle that line between NFL star and gaming nerd is always so fun. He’s been in that locker room at least during an NFL championship game and has seen Favre probably die a little bit inside after losing a game he knew he’d never get another shot at. Pretend that wasn’t Favre for a moment, and just a really good professional at their job, doing it likely for the last time. That’s kind of messed up, but Kluwe has that perspective.
As well as that perspective that a UCLA degree offers. He knows society is ugly, and gets the materialism. It’s pretty disgusting. He knows he’s lucky to be where he’s at, and he knows fans make sacrifices to cheer. And he appreciates it. But that’s why he’s able to espouse on the Super Bowl in such a multifaceted way, and – as silly as it sounds – makes the article kind of interesting.
I mean, not THAT interesting, since it was really just about the Giants and the Patriots, and now you’re reading it three days after the fact, but whatever. Go read it, beef flaps.
And in case you didn’t understand the headline, here’s a video of Wet Hot American Summer, and a link to Marisa Ryan taking her shirt off. Totally worth it: