First, let me just say how aware I am that I am falling precisely for this little turd's ultimate goal of helping him gather views on his shitty little Vikings fan freak out video here.
BUT … With that being said, let me also admit that the only reason I'm featuring this video is because I want to eviscerate this little Vikings shit very badly. So. Let's begin.
The following video has been floating around the internet this past week. It's the latest (note: Not "greatest") video of a Vikings fan freaking out over a football game because, gosh darn it, I really thought this was going to be our year, our game, our moment, especially with Joe Webb starting at quarterback! As the "totally not planned freak out" will show you, however, this Vikings fan was particularly heart broken.
A few notes:
- Who cheers that excited about, what, a field goal? That's the only thing that could have happened early, and this guy absolutely freaks out about it. Really? It was three points. Were you pretty confident that those three points were going to be enough to win the game? Do you just love Blair Walsh that much? Doesn't look like it, since you're not even wearing his jersey.
- Oh, all we need is a touchdown? Boy, we're still in this thing if we get a touchdown? Good luck, doofus. Try "We need three touchdowns and at least two Blair Walsh field goals to beat what ultimately would have been the final score of this game, but you know if we would have put that up the Packers would have tried harder and ended up scoring additional points, which means that if we still wanted to win, we also would have had to score additional points to keep winning, so we would have needed SEVERAL touchdowns to get back in this thing!" Several, sir, SEVERAL. Not one.
- Way to man up and throw that pillow like you mean it. STUPID PILLOW! YOU'RE SO SOFT AND DELICATE BETWEEN MY THIGHS!
- Haha, hurray! A totally-not-pre-planned coffee table crushing! Boy, who put that fan behind the couch there during the winter? So random! Just in case the game got so "heated" and you needed to cool down? Good thing you didn't pause long enough to plan your aggressive down stroke through the glass table, except you did. And over what? A Joe Webb interception? Oh no! I never saw that coming! I thought his deep ball was the most accurate ever, aaahhhhh! What the hell is wrong with you.
- What a conveniently clean and austere room you are in to watch football, where if – Lord forbid – you were happen to break some tables and get glass everywhere that it'd be easy to clean up. So smart of you!
- This is obviously the shittiest playoff football viewing party ever. A dude and his girlfriend in a room together with Grandma's old table and a stand up fan. Mmmmmm, we better put some red Solo cups out there to make it look like it's a real party. Uh oh! What's in there?! Water?! Huh huh oh, you're never going to find out! I bet it sucks though.
Whatever. The video is a trillion percent fake (and stupid) so who cares. And, if it's not fake, it's even worse, because Jesus, dude, grow the fuck up. Vikings football has NEVER matter that much, unless you are a horrible human being.
But these videos below? These mostly aren't fake. When looking at the above garbage fan video, we also found this playlist aptly titled "vikings fans crying." It's good for several laughs:
And this is why I hate people. Enjoy your day.