vikings players at twins game

Stop Getting Your Twins in My Vikings

Here's a picture of Minnesota Vikings players Kyle Rudolph, Matt Cassel (I know, right?), Christian Ponder, and Greg Jennings, (I know, right?!). They are at a Twins game that happened recently.

And for no real reason, this greatly upsets me. 

I think if you were to ask most fans about whether or not they like to see players in their town cheer for athletes of another team in the town, they'd totally want them to do that. Like, what if Kevin Love was a Packers fan?! AWFUL. Or even worse, if Ricky Rubio was a Packers fan. My god damn heart would break. Or if Mikko Koivu was a HUGE Arizona Diamondbacks fan. Wouldn't that just rub your foreskin the wrong way? It probably would mine, if I had any.

Which is why it's weird that when I look at the picture in this post, it doesn't make me happy, it just makes me FURIOUS. Maybe it's because I hate baseball because it's old and stupid. Maybe it's because stupid Target Field got built before Metrodome 2, and I hate that all nerdy baseball fans talk about is how BEAUTFIUL TARGET FIELD IS when they won't even go to fill the stadium anymore. Maybe it's because the Twins are a bunch of wieners and their die-hard fans are a bunch of wieners too, especially the die-hard fans who hate football for some reason. I mean, you're legitimately choosing to follow baseball over football? Are you 104 years old? God I want to fight you.

But it also definitely has something to do with most Twins teams being a bunch of puss bags. I feel like if I see members of the Vikings cheering on the Twins, that the Vikings players will become tampon-faces themselves. Twins players are soft, and I can't have that rubbing off (haha) on Vikings players I have to root for this season. I have too much riding on 16 games a year. No one cares about your 182. Come on.

And so when I see TC Bear thinking he's a quirky, cross promoting local mascot, it raises my blood pressure. It makes me want nothing more than to see VIKTOR the VIKING jump through a hoop on fire with a motorcycle and a dazzled hooker on the back so he can round house TC Bear in the face and then do a line of coke off of his beady eyes. That would be AWESOME.

In conclusion, is it football season yet? 

PJD

About PJD

I once saw Paul Edinger kick a 56-yard field goal for the Minnesota Vikings against the Green Bay Packers to win a game in the Metrodome. It was exhilarating.

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