christian ponder teddy bridgewater 2014

You Ever Notice How Quarterbacks Throw Like This?!

“Yo, check this out!

“You ever notice how black guys throw the football like this?”

teddy bridgewater camp 2014

* Mocks taking a snap from a center* Drops back 5-steps with perfect footwork
* The whole time keeps his head on a swivel
* Checks his first receiving option
* Checks his second receiving option
* Checks his third receiving option
* Checks back to his first receiving option, but still doesn’t like what he sees
* Hits his final step
* Snaps his head back to his check down option
* Plants his feet, squares his shoulder
* Launches perfect spiral to his check down option
* Exemplifies perfect follow through while standing tall in the pocket despite immense pressure in his face
* Smiles and prepares for next snap

“Yeah, but white guys, see, they throw a football like this!”

christian ponder camp 2014

* Looks for an actual center to take a snap from, sees none, complains, then laughs as he realizes it’s practice, not live action, and instead grabs a ball from a football cart that was literally sitting right next to him.
* Begins his 5-step drop
* Trips twice over his feet during his first step drop back
* Stops his drop back at 3-steps
* Stops, counts off steps on his fingers, laughs at himself with hands on his hips, exaggeratedly takes two more steps back, throwing his hands up in a mock sign of dismay
* Looks at his first receiving option
* Keeps looking at his first receiving option
* Opens his eyes wide at his first receiving option, patting the ball and bouncing on his feet, waiting for his first receiving option to get open
* Yells, “Hello! I’m trying to throw to you! Get open!”
* Waits 5 more minutes waiting for his first receiving option to get open, until said receiving option gets so tired he falls to the ground, passed out
* Throws ball to first receiving option
* Watches as ball bounces off prone body of maybe-dead first receiving option
* Chuckles to self, throws hands in the air with a “Whaddya gonna do?!” laugh
* Walks to sidelines and drinks pickle juice

“It’s true, it’s true! White guys are so lame!”

PJD

About PJD

I once saw Paul Edinger kick a 56-yard field goal for the Minnesota Vikings against the Green Bay Packers to win a game in the Metrodome. It was exhilarating.

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