jimmy clausen bears

Always Remember Jimmy Clausen Sucks

As we head into the last game of the season against the Chicago Bears, I just want people to remember one thing: Jimmy Clausen is a shit head. I mean, Jay Cutler is also a shit head, but his time as a Chicago Bear largely seems over and done with, even if he is playing […]

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Merry Christmas 2014 from Purple Jesus Diaries

For seven years now (or so, give or take, depending on when you started counting), Purple Jesus Diaries has been wishing our 8 readers a Merry Christmas. I say 8 this year, because I think the average daily visitors has maybe gone up by 4, but also down by one because they really approve of […]

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Vikings vs. Dolphins: Mushroom Stamp Winner

It’s Mike Priefer. It’s Mike Priefer and his shitty special teams squad forever. Last week Blair Walsh couldn’t hit the broad side of a Kardashian ass. This week, Jeff Locke gets his fucking punt blocked for a game winning safety. A FUCKING PUNT BLOCKED. Keep in mind, he is an NFL player, a real, NFL […]

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PJD’s Week 16 Recap: Only Acknowledging Teddy

Yes, I know the Vikings lost on Sunday. Yes, I know HOW they lost on Sunday. Yes, I know most people are tearing into a certain unit on the team like it’s a virgin asshole meeting the Incredible Hulk. I, however, will not be doing that today. Instead, I will be focusing on the positive […]

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Did Someone Really Eat That At The Vikings / Lions Game?

I have been kind enough to include a “feature” image on this post that won’t stick you right in the eye, but for some of the disgusting goodness that is the cesspool called Detroit, Michigan and Detroit Lions fans, go ahead. Scroll down a little bit further in this post, yes, even further below this […]

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Vikings vs. Lions: Mushroom Stamp Winner

Blair Walsh is this week’s Mushroom Stamp of Disapproval winner. Check this out. In Blair Walsh’s rookie year, 2012, he finished the season with a 92.1% field goal percentage. 92% of the time he was good, all the time. That was 35 out of 38 field goals, with 10 of those attempted AND made were […]

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PJD’s Week 15 Recap: How To Become The New Lions

I don’t know, maybe that’s not fair. The Lions of yesteryore have and were completely awful. I mean, they are the only team in the modern era to have gone 0-16. That’s super bad! No one else has done that in recent history. Lions, you’ll always have that! So, no, the Vikings aren’t THAT bad, […]

Vikings look to play spoiler in Detroit

The Minnesota Vikings are out of the playoff race heading into Week 15, but they can still play spoiler when they take on the Lions in Detroit. While playing spoiler will be Minnesota’s main angle, the Lions are on the opposite side of things, as they try to keep pace with the Green Bay Packers […]

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Jets vs. Vikings: Mushroom Stamp Winner

OK, obviously I gave it to Jarius Wright, as you can tell by the picture above, but it could have easily gone to any of the guys below: – Teddy Bridgewater: The rookie strikes again late in the game, both with impressive play with 23 seconds left to get the Vikings into a game winning […]

jarius wright jets 2014

PJD’s Week 14 Recap: Audibles for the Win

After failing to move the ball for much of the second half in Sunday’s game against the Jets, Teddy Bridgewater went into overtime tied 24-24 and pulled a Rex Grossman, kind of, when he said, “Fuck it, I’m going bubble screen.” But then the bubble screen went deep – 87 yards deep – to Jarius […]

mike zimmer bullshit

Mike Zimmer Has Opinion’s on Clocks

How does Mike Zimmer feel about clocks? Here’s another reason – aside from Mr. Zimmer Coach making this defense respectable this year – as to why Mike Zimmer is cool. I think this came after the Chicago Bears game where we all learned that, indeed, the clocks ARE bullshit. There was a malfunction or something […]

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